Ramadan – So Remember Me

Ramadan 2024 Reflections: First Third

We’ve already made it through a third of Ramadan!

Even though it’s far from my first time fasting Ramadan, I always have a slight twinge of apprehension before the fast starts.

How thirsty will I get?

Will I be able to manage alright breastfeeding, working, running errands and a household and watching children?

Am I going to reach maghrib each night hanging on for dear life?

Doubts pass through my head as the month approaches, but I also place my trust in Allah that this is a month of mercy and that He will make it easy upon us all. And thus, without fail, I complete (almost, a couple of days were still hard) each fast easier than I thought I would, alhamdulillah. There were some big transitions in our family that happened literally the same week of Ramadan starting that made me a little more nervous as well, but again, Allah helped us through.

Something that helped me get most of everything done at work and home while keeping my energy and spirits up is to try and slow down. I’m the type of person that approaches each day with a plan and idea of what I want to accomplish, and I’ve realized how much importance I place on seeing this plan through, that sometimes it can deeply affect my mood and well-being if I percieve that my day didn’t go to plan. I needed to shift this mindset for this month because I knew I would drive myself and others crazy trying to do all the things while fasting. I told myself that it’s to be expected that you may not be able to get absolutely everything done that you normally would at work or at home due to your energy levels and the extra ibadah you’re filling your time with, so I’m trying to remember to accept that I’m operating on an alternate mode — Ramadan mode — for these 29-30 days.

With that let’s enter into the second third of the month in high gear, settled in our fasts and our ibadah, and ready to continue making the most of each day and night!

Maximize Ramadan with This Grid

I have been waiting in anticipation for this year’s Ramadan to arrive: cleaning, organizing, decluttering, and decorating our home in preparation for the same disencumbering, polishing, and beautifying I hope our souls will witness during the month. Now that our physical surroundings have undergone a transformation, my mind was prepared to decide what and how I wanted to accomplish taking full advantage of the month.

I identified and planned out six key areas that I am giving extra attention to, insha’Allah, organized into thirds to help me accelerate my actions during the last 10 days of the month, during which we should all strive to seek laylat-ul-qadr. The key areas for me are: qur’an, salah, dhikr, du’a, sadaqah, and relationships.

Here is a grid that organizes my goals for each category for each part of the month. It is my intention to perform these acts for Allah alone, so I have retracted certain numbers of for fear of riya’, but left enough information to help you customize your own goals, insha’Allah.

	First Third	Second Third	Last Third
Qur’an	-Read x0 pages after Fajr -Read x0 pages during the day	-Read x0 pages after Fajr -Read x0 pages during the day	-Read x0 pages after Fajr -Read xx0 pages during the day
Salah	-Pray tahajjud -Pray taraweeh	-Pray tahajjud -Pray taraweeh	-Pray x0 minutes earlier tahajjud -Pray taraweeh -Pray an extra X0 minutes of nafl after taraweeh
Dhikr	-Istighfar x00 times -Salawat x00 times -La illaha illa Allah x00 times	-Istighfar x00 times -Salawat x00 times -La illaha illa Allah x00 times	-Istighfar x00 times -Salawat x00 times -La illaha illa Allah x00 times
Du’a	-Read from dua list, after each fard prayer and tahajjud, and upon breaking the fast	-Read from dua list, after each fard prayer and tahajjud, and upon breaking the fast	-Read from dua list, after each fard prayer, tahajjud, after nafl, and upon breaking the fast
Sadaqah	-Give $x amount	-Give $x amount	-Give double $x amount spread out over the nights of 21, 23, 25, 27, 29
Relationships	-Remain calm and collected	-Remain calm and collected	-Remain calm and collected

This is my first time separating my goals based on thirds, but it really helped me to see how I can realistically stretch myself in the last 10 nights and I hope you get some inspiration from it as well.

Insha’Allah, we are all able to maximize our good deeds during this Ramadan and that they are all accepted and that we are able to catch laylat-ul-qadr.

How To: Fast and Breastfeed During Ramadan

I was so nervous to fast this Ramadan. So many doubts and worries plagued me during the weeks leading up to Ramadan.

Would my supply decrease? I don’t want to starve my baby!

The fasting time is 17-18 hours. How will I ever be able to do that?

How thirsty was I going to get during the day? I’m already so thirsty after each session!

How am I going to be able to work full time, take care of the baby, pump and breastfeed with little sleep? I’ve only ever done Ramadan with a full night’s sleep and plenty of rest during the day time as well!

This is my first Ramadan fasting as a mother of an infant, being sleep deprived, working full time, and exclusively breastfeeding. Even though I know I am exempt for fasting due to breastfeeding, I really wanted to experience Ramadan with the rest of the family and the ummah, so I prepared myself before Ramadan and during iftar and suhoor everyday to keep my supply up and my energy steady during the day.

Here is what I did and am doing now that is allowing me to fast during Ramadan!

Drink at least 96 ounces of water from iftar to suhoor

This is how much is recommended an exclusively breastfeeding woman is to intake every day since a baby can take anywhere from 19-30 ounces of breastmilk a day. I have been using a water bottle that has the measurements on the side, so I am sure to drink enough everyday.

Drink two bags of steeped “Mother’s Milk” tea a day

There’s all sorts of tea on the market that helps you increase your supply. Mother’s Milk Tea is one of the most well-known ones and it’s one that I’ve been taking since my baby was born. Since I don’t want to drink hot tea when I’m thirsty, what I do is steep 6 bags or so in about 4 cups of water. I let it steep for a few hours so that it’s very strong and all of the goodness from the herbs is in the tea. Then I dilute the tea by pouring it in a pitcher of cold water and keep it cool in the refrigerator. Six bags of tea is enough for 3 days, but you can drink more or less as you need it. I will have 32 ounces of this diluted tea to help me reach my goal of drinking 96 ounces of water daily. Alternatively, you can try out lactation cookies. I’ve never tried them so I can’t vouch for their effectiveness, but plenty of other women seem to have had success with them.

Eat healthy, calorie-dense foods

An exclusively breastfeeding woman can expend up to 500 extra calories a day producing breastmilk, so it’s crucial that you get enough calories to keep up your supply and your energy. I recommend taking in calorie dense foods to help you increase your caloric intake. You’re already drinking more water than a normal person so room is limited in your stomach! Try date ball recipes and eating lots of nuts and nut butters to up your calorie intake.

Eat foods that boost your supply

Here are some foods that boost milk production: oats, barley, garlic, whole grains, vegetables, and sesame seeds. You can have oatmeal or overnight oats for suhoor, have some crudités with hummus during iftar, and prepare a delicious barley soup loaded with veggies.

Rest when you can, as much as you can

Trust me. I know, easier said than done. But as much as possible, try to take naps and rest as much as you are able to. Milk supply decreases when you are overly fatigued and stressed, so try to decompress and take it slow when you can.

This knowledge and a more conscious effort on my part to get the water, nutrition, and rest I need to support my little human, has allowed me to fast with surprising ease during this Ramadan. I hope that any breastfeeding mamas out there who are unsure if they will be able to fast can benefit from my tips here.

Ramadan 2019 Takeaways

Alhamdulillah, another Ramadan fasted and completed.

I’m always amazed at the end of Ramadan as I reflect upon all of the activities I was able to do while fasting. It’s quite a physical feat for all of us and it’s truly special to able to experience the strength and patience Allah grants us during this special time.

However, Ramadan is not only a physical challenge, but mainly a spiritual and mental one and hopefully we’ve all come away from it with some good habits. Here are the ones that I aim to keep long after Ramadan, inshallah.

Intentional Eating

This is an obvious one. After fasting the whole day, even the first drink of water is heavenly let alone everything that follows after. But besides the taste, you can appreciate what food and drink does for your body, how it affects your emotions, and the social aspects of sharing a meal. I want to continue making mealtime a ritual that is shared and savored.

Patience

Abstaining from food and drink for the whole day can make even the most mild mannered of us irritable, short tempered, and moody. I had to reign in my emotions and calm down when I found myself getting frustrated at life. There’s nothing like trying to hold and calm a tired, crying baby while preparing iftar after a long day of fasting to make you learn to go inward and focus on the task at hand without letting the external conditions affect you. I had to surrender my expectations of how I thought someone should act, or how I wanted my plans to play out, and find peace in knowing what I could control and not letting what I couldn’t control fluster me.

Remove the Noise

Throughout the month, my social media activity was nearly zero. I wanted to disconnect myself from everyone. I knew that this Ramadan was going to be the most difficult one for me thus far because I had a lot of conditions up against me: breastfeeding, sleep deprived, working full-time, and caring for an infant. I made the decision to stay off of social media to keep to myself and rest whenever I had a rare moment, instead of inviting any negative emotions that can arise from mindless scrolling. An unintentional side effect of this was a sense of clarity into what was important to me and not because someone made online made it look appealing. When I started to let myself decide what was worth my time, I started feeling more content, decisive, and confident. That’s why removing myself from the noise of social media and allowing myself to think for myself is a key habit that I want to keep.

There you have it. Those are habits that I gained this Ramadan that if I can continue, will positively affect my relationship with Allah, others around me, and myself. I wish you all a happy Eid and another year filled with sustained, positive habits!